That's not severe...

AccuWeather just informed me of a severe weather alert for the area tonight:

A FREEZE IS EXPECTED IN PARTS OF CENTRAL ARKANSAS FRIDAY AND
SATURDAY MORNINGS.

A VERY COLD CANADIAN AIRMASS WILL SETTLE OVER THE AREA TONIGHT THROUGH SATURDAY...AND BRING VERY COLD TEMPERATURES TO PARTS OF CENTRAL ARKANSAS. MORNING LOW TEMPERATURES ARE EXPECTED TO BE IN THE MID TO UPPER 20S OVER CENTRAL ARKANSAS BOTH FRIDAY AND SATURDAY MORNINGS.

For god's sake, put on a sweater and quit whining about it.

And get off my lawn.

Phrases that I don't want to hear:

"I found a brown recluse spider in your truck. I tried to kill him but he got away. Fast little bugger."

The bad news? He wasn't joking.

The good news? It wasn't my truck.