So, yeah. I haven't had the best couple of weeks.

Did I mention my Dilbert-esq project already? The one where the company wants me to evaluate a piece of software without actually even seeing it? I get a data file that it produces and get to talk to the programmer. Lucky me.

Last week I put in 40 hours of overtime. The week before, nearly 20, and this week is on track for another 20. Needless to say, I've been stressed. Everybody gets cash for Christmas this year, since I don't have the time or mental capacity to do any shopping (including for gift cards).

Tonight, I left the office at about 9:30, so I could go home and at finish my job from home. After all, if I'm going to be working until about 2 a.m., at least I should be able to do it in the comfort of my apartment, right?

As I approach my apartment, I see two trailers labeled "City of Calgary Emergency Water Supply". This is not good. I enter my apartment, however, and find no notice of a water outage. "Goody." Think I. " It must have happened early in the day, and they've gotten it fixed and just haven't gotten around to moving the trailers out."

Boy am I a glutton for punishment.

Got to my apartment and found that yes, the water was indeed off. I couldn't find the emergency maintenance number, but I had to assume that somebody had already called it. Heading downstairs to make sure, I bumped into a couple of people with buckets. Apparently the water has been out since 7:00 this evening, and is expected to be out for up to three days.

Come on world. What else you got for me?

Grrrr. Stupid computer vans locking up. Stupid software crashing. Stupid satellite dish breaking. It all adds up to a very bad day at work.

I have no booze and I must drink.

Well, it took almost a full month, but I'm more or less unpacked now. I've still got to sort out the storage room and do a bit more organizing in the den, but I'm no longer eating takeout every night, and that's what's important. It's still taking some time getting used to the noise downtown. Hopefully that doesn't take too long to adjust.

Work... goes. It's one of those "the more things change the more they stay the same" type things and I'll just leave it at that. I've started working weekends again. I'm not really in the regular rotation so I've just been filling in for people here and there. I'm going to have to stop doing that for a couple of weekends so I can have some time off.

My Riders lost the Grey Cup. I'm disappointed in the outcome - especially with how it ended - but in the grand scheme of things I think that they exceeded everybody's expectations for both the season and the big game itself, so I can't complain too much. I'm more annoyed by the people at my office that were cheering for "anybody but Saskatchewan" and then complaining that Saskatchewan fans are arrogant.

House is officially sold. Mortgage is paid off and all that jazz. After all fees were paid I made a grand total of about $136 on it. Definitely could have been worse. The fact that the company is supposed to reimburse me for a chunk of those fees helps as well.

Oh crap. Now that everything's calmed down I've realized that Christmas season's started.

Goddammit.

I sat down on my bed this morning to put on my socks, and the bed collapsed. The frame itself held together, but some of the slats and crossrails (it doesn't use a box spring) gave out. Since my apartment doesn't actually have lights in the bedroom and I haven't been able to find where my lamps were packed yet, I'll have to wait until I get home tonight to find out what the damage is and if I'm sleeping at my parents' place tonight.

When did I acquire so much crap?

Seriously. Everything's been moved up to my new apartment and there's probably a grand total of 50 square feet in my place for the time being. I knew that I had bought a fair amount of stuff down south and had enough space at the time that it wouldn't be noticeable, but right now I'm wondering how long it'll be before I can actually use my kitchen.

The renovations weren't quite finished when I moved in on Tuesday, and the building manager had her handyman over last night trying to replace part of my bathroom sink. Somehow he managed to turn the wrong valve and dumped around 10 gallons of water on my floor before he could shut it off again. I'm definitely glad that I got water damage coverage with my insurance package.

On the plus side, my couch looks really good with the new paint and carpet, I have my own bed to sleep in, my entertainment center is set up to help prevent me from chucking stuff off the balcony in frustration, and I have internet in my home for the first time in nearly 3 years.

Also, there's a great coffee shop on the ground floor of my building. Seriously. Great coffee that's not roasted to the point of near charcoal, AND free homemade muffins with any coffee from 6 - 10 am? Somebody explain to me how the hell is the Starbucks across the street still open?

Well, I am back from Arkansas for likely the last time. The original plan was to fly down on Friday, supervise the packup & loading (and make sure that the movers didn't forget anything) and sign a few forms on Saturday, then fly back on Sunday. Almost immediately after booking my tickets, though, the movers asked if they could do the packup on Friday and load on Saturday. I agreed, beginning to wonder if I really needed to go back down to Arkansas at that point. Last week they asked if they could do the loading on Friday too.

The long and the short of it was that the moving company had packed and loaded everything before I touched down in Little Rock (excepting one cupboard of corning-ware and an empty suitcase that they missed). Ah well. It was good to see the house one last time, if more than a little depressing. Also, the movers loaded the wine. Yay!

On the flight back I ran into more delay at the Calgary airport than I've ever experienced before. It took me over 25 minutes just to make it from the airplane to the beginning of the customs area (at which point there was at least another 30 minutes worth of disneyland-like lineups back and forth before you got to talk to anybody). Fortunately at that time I could get into the Nexus lineup. That pass is worth its wait in gold some days. Still, I can at least understand that if for some reason that they have about a dozen planes landing at once its going to cause a delay.

The parking situation was another matter entirely. They normally have 8 tills open to pay your parking tab upon exiting. In this case they only had 2 open. It turns out that their automatic pay system was down. Fine. I don't have a problem with that. What I do have a problem with is them labeling 4 of the 6 closed tills as "open" and allowing traffic to split into 6 lanes before they can see the little pylons that they've put in to block your way. This forced the mother of all traffic jams as people tried to merge 6 lanes into 2 that was actually backing up traffic so far that people were having delays getting in to the parkade to park. Naturally the airport was still charging people for the extra time needed to exit the parkade.

Ahh Calgary. How I've missed you.

Happy Dance!

Woot! The buyers countered my own offer with a realistic offer of their own. I'm making a little bit on the house, though I have to give them the lawn tractor, fridge, and freezer. I get to keep the washer & dryer (by which my parents get almost new washer & dryer). All in all, very fair - especially for me. I won't be completely satisfied until I've got the paperwork, but it's definitely a stress relief for me.

Wow. It only took me two days to be fed up with the cold and the snow. I really did become a wimp down south. In actuality, I think that the cold is easier to deal with than 105 degree heat with 90% humidity. I just like to complain.

I found an apartment in town. South facing, good size, decent price, and only seven blocks to the office. The only real bummer is that the kitchen is tiny. I'll have to work on that to see if I can find a way to extend it. My stuff should be arriving around November 2nd, so I'm looking forward to that.

Also, some people finally made an offer on my house. They low balled me on it, but it's a start. My realtor is cautiously optimistic that she can get them up to a more reasonable price.

Whew. Busy couple of weeks.

Got back to Calgary, bought a car, went to my cousin's wedding, got set up for work, and am still in the process of apartment hunting. The house still hasn't sold, but I'm not worried... yet.

I've never had as much problem with the dry air up here as I'm having this time around. I'm also having enough sinus problems that I think that I should see a doctor.

Still, it's good to be back.

It's strange how different it is moving my stuff back to Canada than it was getting it down here in the first place.

On my trip down, I just had the movers show up at my apartment, gave them my new address, and the next time I saw them was at my house down here. Going back I need to get them proof of my current (US) residence, meet customs officers, and whatnot.

Now I'm also having issues with my alcohol. Getting down here, it was just packed up and unpacked with everything else. I didn't think twice about it and the movers didn't mention it.

This time, the movers have said that their policy is that they don't handle alcohol at all - even sealed bottles. So I tried FedEx, and DHL, and other shipping companies. No dice. "Fine." I thought. "I'll just pack it good and check it with my luggage on my flight. The company is paying for that anyhow." Until I find out that they need special containers for alcohol. It wouldn't be an issue if it was just a couple of bottles - I'd just wrap it up good and stuff it in my bags. Unfortunately, I've got a couple of cases of the stuff (most of it local wines that you can't get outside of the wineries down here). It's not the end of the world, but it is frustrating. The way things are going I might have to leave it down here until somebody from our company decides to drive up to Canada and then reimburse them for the duty.

I've managed to actually get money transferred back up to Canada, which has made me annoyingly - albeit temporarily - chipper. Although it might seem like a small thing to some, if you remember my difficulties in getting the money down here in the first place I think that my reaction to getting it wired the other way in three days is understandable. What really blows me away is that the tiny local bank down here in the middle of nowhere has said that they have no issues arranging a transfer for the rest of my money remotely once I'm up in Canada and need to close down this account. BMO said that I had to go to one of their branches in person to arrange such a thing.

I think that the stress is getting to me right now. I have a nagging feeling that I'm forgetting something, but that's likely just the worry about having stuff to sell that hasn't sold yet. Still, it's making me testy. Garbage pickup was late yesterday? I was seething. Unfortunately, there isn't a lot left for me to do. I've inventoried my house and set up services to be canceled once I move out. All I really have left to do is sit and wait. And wait. And wait.

Second verse, same as the first.

Talked to several more CS reps at DirecTV, with pretty much the same result across the board. My sister suggested that I email Larry Hunter, the interim CEO, and Ellen Filipiak, Senior VP of Customer Relations, and even helped me trim the venom out of said email so it wasn't just frothing incomprehensible spittle. The result was the following:

Mr Hunter,

Approximately three months ago, I decided to switch away from one of your satellite TV competitors. One issue of concern in choosing my new provider was the cancellation fee as I was working in the US on a work visa and could not guarantee I would be living in the United States long-term. While I was talking to your sales agent on the phone about the contract I was informed of having to sign a two-year contract. At that time I explained my situation to your agent and that I could not guarantee that I would still be living in the United States in two years time. Your agent assured me that, in the event that I had to cancel my account due to moving to a location that DirecTV does not provide service to (i.e. Canada) I would not be charged an early cancellation fee. With that assurance in place I was happy to choose DirecTV as my new satellite provider and I entered into a contract on that basis.

Three weeks ago, my employer decided to transfer me back to our head office in Calgary, Canada. Last week, in preparation for the move, I phoned DirecTV and canceled my service. Again I was told by your agent that because DirecTV does not provide service in Canada, I would not be charged an early cancellation fee. This week I checked my final bill and was shocked to see a $440 early cancellation fee included.

Based on my previous conversations with DirecTV, I assumed that this was a simple administrative error and I phoned your billing department. The billing department admitted the mistake, even going so far as to confirm that there was a note in my file detailing that I was not to be charged an early cancellation fee. Your agent forwarded me to your cancellations department because it was not within his power to remove the fee.

At this point, my experience with DirecTV became less than satisfactory. Every person I have subsequently spoken with has reiterated the same thing: That no matter what your agents have told me at least three times in the past, DirecTV does not waive early cancellation fees and I will have to pay the $440 fee. They did, however, reassure me that they will try to make sure that an agent never misrepresents DirecTV to a customer again. After talking to multiple people at your company, I have been left with the recourse of mailing a letter to your Billing Disputes department in Colorado. I was told that the matter MIGHT get resolved in several weeks time, long after I have moved back to Canada.

I am sorry, but the fact that you will not stand behind your own sales agent and that your other agents in billing, cancellations, and customer service will do nothing to facilitate getting this matter resolved is very unprofessional and frankly, unacceptable. I entered into my agreement with DirecTV in good faith that your agent was able to contract on your behalf and that the services would be as discussed.

I hope that this letter will help facilitate getting this issue resolved in a timely and fair manner. To be clear, I would like the early cancellation fee cancelled and my money refunded before I move back to Canada at the end of the month.

The result was a phone call from another CS rep who was absolutely unhelpful. Thus have I emailed Larry once more with the following:

Mr. Hunter,

Regarding my previous email, I was recently contacted by one of your customer service agents regarding the matter I stated. While very apologetic, she had obviously not even read my complaint when she phoned, as she seemed rather confused when I mentioned that the agreement I had entered into with DirecTV was based on the misinformation provided by your sales agent. She then suggested that I reactivate my account and have it suspended while I was in Canada. This made her seem to fail understand that this is not a temporary move for me, and while I might end up living down in the US in the future the current transfer I am undertaking is, for all intents and purposes, permanent. Her lack of familiarity with the situation which was described quite clearly in my email, is disheartening. Finally, she continued to repeat what I have heard from several other representatives with your company - that despite the fact that I entered into a contract with DirecTV because I was misled, I would still be forced to pay the early cancellation fee. I would like to know if this is your company's final say on the matter.

I've pretty much resigned myself to losing this fight. They immediately took the early cancellation fee off of my credit card (required by them for just such an emergency, apparently). I've reported them to the BBB, and am still considering small claims court except that I likely will be living in Canada by the time anything happens.

[sarcasm] Thank You Direct TV [/sarcasm]

So about 3 months ago I swapped over from DishNetwork to Direct TV, since the former had proven to have issues giving me the sports channels needed to watch the upcoming CFL season. At the time I was signing up with Direct TV, I was told that I needed to sign a 24 month contract with the standard early cancellation fee.

I remember quite clearly asking the nice person on the other end something along the lines of "What if I have to move to, say, Canada, before then? You guys don't operate up there." to which I was told that in the event that I was moving to a place where Direct TV did not operate then the early cancellation fee would be waived. I happily signed up.

Fast forward approximately 3 months.

Last week I called Direct TV and explained my situation. They said that they would cancel my service, and waive the early cancellation fee. Thank you and have a nice day.

This week I got my final bill. It was rather large, due to the large early cancellation fee I have. I phoned up Direct TV and the conversation went something along the lines of this:

Billing Agent: You're right. There's a note in your file about no cancellation fee. It must have gone through automatically by mistake. I'll have to transfer you to our cancellation department, though.

Cancellation Agent: I'm sorry, but we only remove cancellation fees for soldiers being deployed. Our agents are not allowed to discuss cancellation fees with customers. We'll send out a memo to make sure that they don't do it in the future, but you'll still have to pay your fee.

Cancellation Supervisor: I'm sorry that the only reason that you agreed to sign up with us was because we lied to you, but you're still going to have to pay your fee. All we can do is make sure that our agents don't lie to anybody in the future.

In short: They admit that their agent lied (either deliberately or through ignorance. I don't really care which). They accept that I only agreed to sign up with them because of the lie. And they are quite happy to still take my money. Not surprising, I suppose (and technically legal, since I imagine their TOS doesn't say anything about waiving cancellation fees), but still more than a little dickish. I'd just move back to Canada without paying my bill, but I get the feeling that that would cause problems in the long run if I ever needed to get back into the US.

Fuck You, Direct TV.

Bother.

When I moved down here in 2007, the movers didn't need me for anything other than signing my name at my apartment in Calgary, and being at my house in Beebe to unload my stuff.

Now, for some reason when I'm going the other way I have to meet them at the border and go through a bunch of paperwork with them. Strange.I need to learn how to read the literature that the moving company gives me, and not just listen to their answers.

The shock of the upcoming move finally subsided over the weekend, to be gradually replaced by the stress of having to get everything done in the next month - and in fact, preferably in the next 3 weeks. I'm glad my hair is already short, otherwise I'd already have pulled it all out.

Mama, I'm Coming Home

Well that was sudden.

My boss flew down here late last night for a whirlwind trip. Apparently the main reason for the trip was to ask if I would consider a transfer back to Calgary.

There are a lot of good reasons for it. While the experience down here is great for my career, there's no advancement while I'm here. The kind of work that we do down here, though, has become much more popular up in Canada now, and I apparently have more experience with it than everybody else there combined. It would be a somewhat more senior role than I had when I left, and by all accounts the working environment in the head office has improved quite a bit since I left.

And if all else fails, it's easier for me to find a job in my field in Calgary than it is down here.

One of the girls at work was finally able to identify the mystery pest in my garden as Bird's Nest Fungus. Hooray! It has a name.

Now all I have to do is kill it.

It's not our customers stupidity that bothers me. Everybody has gaps in their knowledge and nobody knows everything. It's their outright arrogance and insistence that they are not completely ignorant.

Does anybody out there know a way to ask "Excuse me. Are you really that stupid?" that won't end with me being fired?

It's been a good weekend. I got to see the Riders play - and win - for the first time since 2007, got a rain barrel set up in my yard to water my plants, and learned that a local diner in town has gotten a liquor license (technically, it's a private club now) - they haven't gotten any alcohol in yet, but I'm predicting that business is going to be quite good once they do, despite a boycott by the local church.

Also, with the heat and humidity my garden has been doing great and I've now got a steady supply of tomatoes. In hindsight, six plants was a little too many for one person.

I need a vacation

Well, I'm back. It was good to see (almost) everybody while I was in Calgary. It's also amazing how two weeks can seem like such a short time. Dad's doing good and is now the proud parent of two bouncing baby kidneys (15 - 20 lb each). Not a bad weight loss plan, though obviously not for everybody.

On the home front, almost everything is doing as well as could be expected in my yard - perhaps too well in some cases. The lemon balm has taken over my herb garden in a way that I didn't think was possible, and I've got at least 20 pounds of tomatoes sitting on the vine waiting to ripen (six plants might have been a little too much for one person). My blueberries have started to ripen, so all in all, it's good. I do have some sort of "thing" (all I know is that it's plantlike) growing in my herb garden that I'm not happy about. It showed up last year, and looks like little single nodules, not unlike a single cell of a wasp's nest except that they carpet the ground. When they open up they release a bunch of tiny, pinhead sized seeds that coat everything around it. I tried burning it all out before I planted this spring, but apparently didn't get it all. Nobody around here can identify it. I might have to try getting a photograph of it if I can get a picture of something that small.

Also, my swallows have hatched. Unfortunately, one is already dead (looked like he either fell from the nest or was pushed out). The others are still alive, but in the 100 degree heat they look like they're having a hard time with it. They just lean their heads over the edge of the nest and pant a lot. I hope they make it.

Not a moment too soon

It's been a good weekend and half week. Last Saturday I availed myself to some of my flex days that the company has given me (as a consolation for the wage rollbacks) and flew out to Washington DC to visit my sister, who is currently working there for about 3 months. It was very relaxing (and in fact, likely saved my liver from a weekend of binge drinking just to forget about work). I did visit DC once, a long time ago when I was still in elementary school, but I don't remember a whole lot of it, so it was fun to revisit a lot of the sites that I barely remembered and visit some sites that I didn't (It was also somewhat painful. I really didn't think that The Mall was that big, and I am fat and lazy.) I also managed to catch a great performance of The Pirates of Penzance at Wolf Trap (the only National Park for the Performing Arts) and have a burger at Ray's Hell Burger (it was good).

Now I'm back home for a week of work and stress and gnashing of teeth before I take off again, this time for two weeks up in Calgary while my dad get's his old kidneys repossessed.

Also, I have house guests. A pair of barn swallows have decided to make a nest in my front porch. They currently have eggs as well. Hopefully they don't make too much of a mess. I rather like having them flit in and out around my yard.

Just like a bad sitcom

I have a new alarm clock. It takes the form of a woodpecker whom, every morning decides that my eaves troughs are a good place to peck at looking for his breakfast. He's also getting there earlier each day. Saturday it was 8:30 a.m. Sunday, 6:45. This morning: 6:00. What really amazes me is how much he sounds exactly like a jackhammer.

More Wildlife!

I might have a problem. What used to be a nice little hobby - plant a herb garden and some trees - has grown into an obsession. In the last few weeks I've entirely rebuilt the front flowerbed, and built two more in the back, filled them with all sorts of flowers (okay, some roses and 3 different types of lilies, but still), planted blackberries, raspberries, and blueberries, and replaced all the trees that died due to wildlife getting at them, my own efforts (or lack thereof), or the guy from Tru-Green running over them.

It was while I was poking around the back fence, looking for a good spot to clear out the overgrowth so that I could plant grape vines that I realized a.) that I might have a small problem; and b.) I was looking at a snake sunning itself on the fence.

It's strange. Arkansas is infested with snakes. My neighbor keeps seeing them all over the place, and yet it's taken over two years before I've finally seen one in my yard (I've seen a couple of dead copperheads at work). Fortunately, I don't think that it was venomous. I wasn't able to get a photo of it (batteries in the camera were dead as usual. By the time they had charged up enough the snake had left) but I think that it was a Black Racer. About 3 feet long. On the one hand, I'm kinda happy that I've got more wildlife in my area, but I'm still going to be a little nervous clearing out my overgrowth.

Also, since when did you need a computer sciences degree to repair a fridge? The EPA or the DOE or something recently decided that the model of fridge I bought was using more energy than the manufacturer said that it was supposed to, so they sent me a kit to "fix" it. Said kit includes a circuit board that appears as though it would work very well in my next computer. I feel old now.

It's officially spring

We've now had our first local tornado watch of the year.

There is nothing I can say that will improve upon the pure win that is this video

Kovbasa: P. Eng.

About time.

I finally got it. Squee. I recognize that in the grand scheme of things this isn't particularly special. After all, there are thousands - if not tens of thousands - registered engineers in Alberta alone, and my job down here doesn't even require it. Still, it's nice to finally have.

Of course, now I've finally realized that there's a decent amount of bookkeeping just to maintain it (Continuing Professional Development forms). The upside of this is that they require me to actually attend conferences and classes and such - something that only happened on rare occasion while I was working in Canada, but has a slightly higher frequency of occurrence down here.

The other big pain in the ass is registering down here. If I was working in, say, Saskatchewan, it would pretty much just be a matter of contacting APEGGS with my APEGGA information and paying a fee. Not so down here. The process is a little more complicated, as in they might not even view my degree as having come from an accredited institution. It might also involve me having to, in essence, rewrite every final exam from my last year of university. Somehow I don't think that will happen.

Oh well. Yay me.

I have a superpower

My power is not so practical as flight, nigh-invulnerability, or heat vision. No my superpower is the ability to, with only a few words, manage to cause a shit-storm of a fight between my two bosses.

Now if I just figure out how to harness my power. For good, for awesome, I don't really care. I'd just like to be able to decide when to use it.

*Facepalm*

I just talked to APEGGA today to find out the status of my P. Eng application, as I have not heard a thing one way or the other from them since October. I do know that they had to be processing it, though, since they had billed me the processing fee, and all of my references had notified me that they had filled out the forms APEGGA needed filled out.

Unfortunately, APEGGA didn't get that last memo. They are still waiting for the forms from two of my references. This means that it will likely be at least another three months before my application gets processed.

I'm surrounded by assholes

Okay, maybe "surrounded" is too strong a word. That said, there do seem to be a lot of them. The latest one, whom I met this week, really takes the cake I think. This particular asshole worked for an auto-parts store (nothing wrong with that) until our customer hired him as a field consultant. He had NO experience in the oil patch before hired for this job that is grossly under qualified for. Now, a year and a half later, he seems to think that he knows everything about his job, when he proves his incompetence every time he opens his mouth (any consultant who doesn't know what an isolation valve is should be shot). This gets him my scorn and derision, but what really pisses me off about him is an incident that happened a couple of days ago.

We had a line part earlier this week. For those of you who do not know a line part occurs when, for various reasons (worn iron, too high pressure, human error, etc), a steel line that we are pumping through bursts under pressure. There are a lot of safety controls to limit this (regular iron inspections, check valves, pressure relief valves, etc), but they still do happen infrequently and they are always dangerous. We were fortunate that nobody was seriously hurt (one guy was shaken up and a little bruised, but that's it). This particular asshole, immediately after the line part, asks simply: "When can we start pumping again?". Yup, this guy's a real class act. Honestly, it's people like that that cause the oil patch to have such a shitty reputation.

In completely unrelated news, when I came to work this morning, I saw that somebody had actually plugged in the block heater on their truck.

Also, for your amusement, I present the following picture. It was the response from one of the guys in our lab when asked by our Calgary for some pictures of the pumps running some of our testing equipment (a really stupid request, for reasons that I won't go in to here). I hope you get as much enjoyment out of it as I did, since it's the funniest thing that I've seen in a long time.